Worthwhile to be named?

Ok... for now I've given up on my article about the Israeli Jewish gay and the European Jewish gay or I didn't give up actually, let's see I'm just taking some deep breath in order to continue with such heavy subject, a bit of George Elliot, a bit of Maimonides and a bit of Hirsh and even American TV.

The topic is actually much broader than I ever thought and I want to make it a little bit more conclusive, not just rambling between subjects as usual. Concrete stuff, which is usually very difficult to achieve. I want to talk a little bit about gay life, not with an article and not with philological methodology, not even with observation. Just a little talk you know... like those semi-political conversations with friends during which we pretend to change the world.

Nevertheless I'm not in the best of positions to engage myself in such little conversations for less universal topics trouble me at the moment. There's a note left about Anna Frank to be made, a note not about universalism but about the lack of it. A note about journals and about a wife's deepest sensitivities. I still remember that conversation with Svetlana a bit at odds with myself, for it led us through a path which brings nothing in return but the darkness of modern life and the death of the tragedy.

The tragedy is probably dead as a matter of fact, dead since Nietzsche and dead since Arendt. Despite the psycho-analytical approaches in literature and the most state-of-the-art trends we seem to find less and less connections to those natural approaches.

Contradicting Carr I would like to say the modern world gives you the impression that history is fighting against itself, is craving for a new start, for a new beginning. For the sake of this new beginning chaos is nothing but an undeniable fact based on necessity.

That reminds me one of the movies of my teen years, "Trainspotting" and those freaky scenes of pathetically young and deconstructed British life, the generation of the 90's in which I got probably stuck. They claim in the future there won't be such a thing as girls and boys but only people. What do you really think guys? I'm very fond of the concept, with a little bit of deceival and a little bit of morality. This concept brings me those ideas about the city and urban life I enthralled in the previous years; those premises would be unthinkable of in the eyes of the natural life, not because one any lifestyle defies or fights against nature for nature is the primary creator, but because there's a need for balance, even in nature and even in chaos.

The abstractions need to be clearly defined and also their outcome. In the end, what does all this have to do with what I really want to get into? Forget it, I'm not in focus at the moment. Probably some vodka will do the job just fine.

Later

Ari

PD: Wife's not home either, she's out with Elliot. Probably for rye.